I was a woman who absolutely, undoubtedly, without a question valued courtesy over honesty. Here's my perspective on this. If a girl asks me if the orange dress looks good on her or not, why should I tell her otherwise? She already puts it on. In the back of her mind, despite asking for my opinion, she already knows that whether or not I like it, there's a very high chance that she'll be wearing that dress tonight. I mean, if she feels good in it...then why the hell not? Okay, sure. Orange dress = harmless, we get it. However, let's take this small example and place it on a larger scale. What if it was something more harmful? Example: Your friend has adopted a poor eating habit and is packing on a lot of weight. Would you tell him or her the truth? Or would you turn the other way and pretend that s/he is making the right lifestyle choices? Another example. If your best friend is dating someone who emotionally and physically abuses him/her, would you do something about it? More importantly, where should the boundary be drawn when years of friendship is on the line?
I wish I can tell you the right way in going about this, especially since these are dilemmas that I have been facing for quite some time now. It's always this constant battle between what I think is right or what I know to be right when it comes to me. Whether you know it or not, I've praised myself from time to time for being a genuine person. I despise liars and exaggerators, but doesn't it make me a complete hypocrite having claimed all of these things and yet I do not even have the heart to tell my girl friend that the orange dress looks absolutely hideous on her?
Just now, I was researching on this particular topic and found out that the center of any personal success, whether its stability or wellness, has everything to do with honesty. There are always going to be tough calls; however, finding that courage to be honest to someone only means that you care enough for that person. Your intentions, at this point, comes from a good place. I've asked myself all sorts of questions regarding this and I think I finally found my answer. Choosing courtesy over honesty will only damage my credibility and presence; as a result, I will end up feeling extremely horrible and slightly guilty about it all. Ya know---saying things were okay when they weren't, agreeing to do things when I shouldn't have, and accepting proposals when I didn't need to.
This year, I vowed to make a conscious effort to be a better person. So today, I have chosen to be honest, while still remaining respectful. Here's the thing. My words are as venomous as it is kind. However, you should be a little bit more cautious when it's silence that I'm giving you. That's when you know that there's a huge growing elephant in the room. But let's jut hope I'll never have to go that far as to give someone such treatment.